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Shite List

Jay Kernis - The Full of Shite, jack ass, top idiot of the day month and year.

Offense - Replacing Bob Edwards as host of Morning Edition

Kernis is the Senior Vice President for Programming of National Public Radio and evidently a complete asswipe who represents everything that should disgust NPR listeners. Jay Kernis personifies the starched shirt, meddling, over managing, self important executive that is completely out of touch with the customers of the company he's being paid to run and the likes of which we would have thought NPR would be immune to. One might readily expect jackwads like this in places like the Bush White house or Haliburton or Fox News or Safeway foods but not behind the scenes at National Public Radio. Maybe when Ray Kroc's widow donated all that money to NPR she was actually cutting their throats by giving them the means to bring in Shite heads like this to apply cold, unfeeling, out of touch corporate America business practices to a place like public radio where that bullshite shouldn't be allowed to wash. Kernis evidently came on board after years in the network news sector and "initiated a wide-ranging assessment of our core programs to insure that they will meet the challenges of the new era." The result of his findings was to personally decide to replace long standing and much beloved "Morning Edition" host Bob Edwards. What's he going to do next initiate the removal of Vin Scully and Garrison Keilor? He attempted to explain his actions to the Goliard with the following load of crap form letter. 

"Bob is not leaving, he is being reassigned so we can bring in hosts with wide, fresh experience as NPR producers and correspondents in the field. They've reported moving, gripping stories from well beyond the walls of NPR studios. Experienced both in covering news events as they happen and in NPR's remarkable long-form radio journalism, they have brought unique freshness and spontaneity to their NPR hosting. With their leadership, we are embracing the challenges of our new era: to bring to you both context and depth as only NPR can and to do so in a way that matches the pace of news. As a Senior Correspondent, Bob will join a truly great company of his NPR colleagues: Susan Stamberg, Linda Wertheimer, Noah Adams, and Juan Williams. Each has been a host in other times; each is making irreplaceable contributions to NPR today. You will continue to hear Bob, not only on Morning Edition, but also on other NPR programs. We deeply appreciate that you care so much; without passion such as yours, public radio would not succeed. Thank you for listening."

Uh, thanks but go get porked. We weren't listening to you, we were listening to Bob, who has been a much enjoyed and respected part of our morning for all the years you were over wiping bottoms and playing suck up at the networks. How can you sleep with yourself and whoever it is you are in bed with that drove you to this completely inappropriate and despicable decision? Bob didn't want to leave obviously and nobody but you ever imagined that he would depart, after 25 years of rock solid, sterling, down to earth service, in any way but that of his choosing and on any terms but is own. To be called into some smirking vice president's office and be "reassigned" like some downsized, dead weight middle manager is inexcusable and will not be tolerated. Once we can figure out how to protest this act without hurting the small stations that carry NPR instead of the apparent fools at the top we will get organized and do what we can to see that such senseless meddling does not go unpunished and unreported.  In the meantime Mr. Jay Kernis, congratulations! You'll have to settle for enjoying your ignominious status as being number one on our Shite list and loathed and despised by millions of listeners for which Bob Edwards was one of the few bright spots in their morning routines.

What can you do?

Sign Bob Edwards Petition here

Relive Bob's best moments with NPR here


Shite list is a new feature of the Goliard where staff members and readers alike may post names of people who have either committed some egregious act against them personally which is deserving of public mention, or are public figures which have fallen out of favor to the point where a feature story cataloging their offenses is in the works but is not yet complete and a brief preview is needed. It can be seen both as a public forum for publishing names (and pictures if available) of offenders and a preview of more in depth vitriolic writings to come. Offenses can range from being the guy who drives too fast in a school zone to being George Bush. We'll see how it goes.

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