Hey Sean M.
Welcome to the Goliard. We
finally tracked you down and positively identified you! And now that
we have, we just
wanted to use this space to let you know that you are the man!
For the rest of you, even if the name Sean M. Nepita doesn't ring a bell, we'd be
willing to bet that his face will look familiar. You've
probably seen him hundreds of times. IBM, Ford (or it might be
Dodge), Direct TV. He's become one of our favorite working actors. The
reason for our increased adulation is that, in Sean M. Nepita, we've
identified a man with the perfect
expressions to define our time. Sardonic. Jaded without being too
bitter. Sloppily business casual. Nepita is the master of all these
Obviously, we aren't the only ones who think so which is why he
continues to be cast in so many commercials.
Nepita has become such a familiar face in fact, that we have come to
think of him as a fellow Goliard. Like Mark from Holiday Inn and the
Seinfeld cast before
him, he has slowly evolved and embedded himself to the point where
we feel that he is one of us. We find ourselves comforted when he's around.
There we'll be, sitting at the wrong bar in a strange city watching
some sporting event,
when we'll find ourselves suddenly at ease as
if an old friend had just showed up. And this simply because, there, up on the
TV in the corner,
is our man Nepita, hawking some product or other. We never even
usually remember or even know what he's supposed to be selling but,
like the happy drunk on the last bar stool, he just always seems to be around.
He is, in a word, ubiquitous.
We were a bit surprised therefore, given this ubiquity, when we tried to seek more information about him on the
Web and found that there didn't seem to be any. Wasn't he an aspiring actor? Shouldn't
he have his own website or fansite that some family member or other
had put up for him? Wouldn't he have been interviewed by his college or high
school newspaper under the local boy makes good umbrella. But we
looked and there was nothing! In fact, it took all our staff's extensive skills
and some plain old dumb luck just to be able to track down his
name. And this is a guy who is on TV more than Geraldo during a
At first we spent time clumsily searching the net for
info but came up completely empty. This, quite possibly, was due to the fact that all we had to go on was the commercials he
was in. We tried googling "IBM guys in Paris" "Guy in
Dodge Truck who smells bad" "Guy who drops his buddy's laptop" "Guy who
demonstrates the Direct TV favorites feature and figure skating comes on
instead of hockey". All to no avail.
Finally, we thought we had a breakthrough when we were sitting
film called Elizabethtown
and suddenly there was Nepita up on the big screen. He was only
visible for a quick second, (just long enough to give one of his patented sardonic looks
to star Orlando Bloom),
and appeared to be playing a reporter of some kind. We thought we had something until,
as we eagerly looked through the credits, we found that it didn't
say "reporter" anywhere but merely listed all the
characters by name. This seemed bizarre given the fact that there is
no way the viewer could have known,
by watching the movie, what most of the people's names were since
nobody ever says them in the actual film. Looking through the cast later
on the Internet Movie Database, we saw that someone named Sean Nepita had played someone named "Mike Bohanon" in the
film but since we had no idea which of the many peripheral characters might have
been assigned the name "Mike Bohanon" or why they would even bother to
make up names for people who would never be known or called by them,
this wasn't a whole lot of help.
But we kept at it and while searching the Elizabethtown
site in more detail later, we found ourselves clicking on each actor that
seemed a possibility. No pictures were available for most of the minor
characters however and, in some cases, no listing for any other roles at all. Certainly
no tally of their commercial appearances. And when we got down the list to Nepita,
he certainly didn't have a picture and, since we hadn't seen any of
the other films listed in his small oeuvre and would have
had to go rent them and cross reference them all to make any
progress, we just moved on. We could have spent months renting B
movies and researching each minor cast member and still might not be any closer to finding our man.
Unfortunately the only movie we'd
seen and knew for sure he was in was Elizabethtown
which happened to be one of those movies with hundreds of wedding guests and extras
everywhere so this made it a daunting task indeed trying to find out who "Mike Bohanon"
and the guy who played him might be. And since the actor we were
looking for doesn't really seem like he should have a name like
Sean M. Nepita anyway, it wasn't one of the names we thought to
paste into Google when we originally saw it.
We see now that Nepita's
first film mention on IMDB reads like this:
Over the Wire
(1996) (uncredited) .... Man
That sounds about right actually,
in hindsight, since it could really be the tag line for all his cumulative work
up to this point. In
.... Man" seems to sum up Nepita's career quite nicely even
if it doesn't begin to do him justice. If he were to sit down to pen
his autobiography, "(uncredited)
.... Man" would have to be the working title. But like we said, we had no way of
knowing at the time that the actor playing Bohanon was the right guy anyway.
Our big breakthrough came while one of us was stuck breast
feeding and watching something on cable. The baby kicked the remote off the
arm of the couch and it landed just out of reach where mommy couldn't
retrieve it without causing a minor incident or losing a nipple. No
harm done she thought until she looked up and noticed that the
remote's bounce on the floor had also switched the channel and the
was now showing. Having not enjoyed Titanic all that much the first time she sat
through it, our stranded nurser reports that she was not happy with this
development and begin to scrap around with her toes trying to locate
and drag home the remote. Suddenly though, out of the blue, she looked up at
the screen and spotted Sean M. Nepita
toiling deep within the bowels of the doomed, sinking vessel. There he was,
working as an elevator operator manning his post and then abandoning
Kate Winslet as the ship goes
down. With this info, we were then able to use IMDB to trace him
definitively at the Titanic site. Finally, there it was; "Sean Nepita (as
Sean M. Nepita) .... Carney the elevator operator." It also
confirmed that he was Bohanon in
that we had finally learned his name, we figured it would
be an easy thing to track down some more info on his career. But all Google
turned up was the
Internet Movie Database stuff we'd already seen and a bunch of
similar crap from all the hundreds of other less
organized movie sites that basically just list his name and
the minor character he played in some B grade film. Officer Murphy
in 1998's Progeny.
Freddie in 1999's Best
Laid Plans. Sherwood Jones is a 2002 film called Cottonmouth.
Truman Jones in another 2002 movie called Usher
(perhaps a Jones' boys sequel). We hadn't seen any of these films and searching the
Web for images only revealed the picture at right (from some sketchy photo outfit
in LA with a broken link) and the headshot at left from one of the Titanic sites,
neither of which are very good pictures or come close to capturing his essence.
We finally got the picture at the top of this page by sitting in
front of the TV with a camera waiting for one of his ads to come
on. We only had to wait for about twenty minutes and there he was,
sitting in the front of a truck while everyone else gets in the
back. He flashes them all the look of course.
Thinking about all this, we realized that marketing departments and commercial outfits who
want an actor to play the part of everyman in one of their bits are not about to
publicize the name of a person if he's not a star even if he's the main face of their product.
They want him to be identified, not as Sean M. Nepita, but as
"one of those IBM guys that are always standing in lines and
sitting in coffee shops making witty remarks." And Nepita
himself is probably kept so busy running from commercial set to
commercial set, that he doesn't have the time to create a web
presence for himself from which to further market and advertise his skills.
This is where The Goliard comes in and why we decided to do it for him.
From now on, when
someone searches for Sean M. Nepita, they will find the Goliard first
and benefit from all of our leg work. And if we ever get any contact
information for him, we'll post it here and make it one stop Sean M. Nepita
And come on Hollywood! You're dropping the ball. You made stars out
of lunks like Matthew Perry and David Schwimmer and they don't have half the
screen presence that our man Nepita does. A whole sitcom could be devoted
just to Nepita's
We predict it would be wildly successful. At the very least, he
belongs on Curb Your Enthusiasm or Arrested Development as a side
character or neighbor who intervenes in the action every so often. All he needs is a shot. You could have him
in a role where he is merely
sitting around listening to other people talk crap all the time.
Just watching his expressions as he listened to the blah blah blah would
be enough to keep us tuning it.
He would make the perfect bartender in some pub where the show could
be about people stopping in to tell him all their problems everyday. Or
maybe a cabdriver. A bored doorman. Some famous woman's tag along husband. The
guy in the next cubicle or a cop on the beat. The sky's the
limit with this guy. Someone besides big corporations hoping to
modern identity must need the perfect everyman that so definitively embodies our time.
Well look no further. We're convinced that Nepita is it. Give this guy his own gig of some kind
for Pete's sake!
In any event, we can tell you this
much; When The Goliard - The Movie goes into production, Sean M.
Nepita is the first actor we're calling. If we can find the
information on where to reach him that is.
Update - We have contact! The below arrived
in November 2006
Thank you for your kind and supportive words! Your article was very much appreciated by
my friends, family, and myself. Like many people I don't know what tomorrow has in store
for me, but know this, I'm ready for it.
Thank you again.
all the best,
2005. All Rights Reserved.