The Goliard Online - Reviews, opinion, original writing, analysis and pith

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Volume 2 Issue 4

April 2003

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Dateline - The Movie Woman

New Movie Woman grilled about You Can Count on Me

As the Goliard staff continues to flounder trying to fill the void left when The Movie Man ran off with Ms Atwater, we conducted an interview with a new candidate for the position. She refused to be photographed but was coerced into providing a review of a film despite herself. The Goliard makes evidence of that coercion available here in hopes that she will accept the position permanently once she sees her name in the Goliard's big lights. 

Proceed to the Grilling
                       Old MovieMan's Archive

Staff Report

Bookwoman Commissioned to Write Screenplay

The Bookwoman, (shown at right tenentively answering the door of her bungalow in La Jolla when we stopped by to talk to her recently), first gained notoriety reviewing books here at the Goliard and has now been commissioned by an anonymous bigwig fan to write and produce a screenplay. She is excited about the prospect although not confident enough that it will actually go down as planned to give up her night job.

The Bookwoman Interview

Go to her Screenplay


Goliard UA fans  in training 

Camping Caliente

Mi amigo y yo enganchamos para arriba con estos individuos que iban a Alaska en un viaje de la pesca y pedimos que viniéramos adelante. Volamos en Fairbanks y conseguimos a guía tomarnos hacia fuera en el yermo en donde los individuos podrían pescar y buscar y podríamos ser ruidosos y bebemos la cerveza y nos sentamos por el río y el campfire. Nos sentábamos por el agua cuando la guía nos dio algunas campanas y nos dijo ponerlas en nuestras ropas en alguna parte y no ir dondequiera sin ellas. Él me ayudó a enganchar el míos al frente de mi camisa y le pregunté para cuáles eran. Él dijo que en Alaska, se advierte a los turistas que usen campanas minúsculas en su ropa al ir de excursión o colgando hacia fuera en país del oso. Las campanas advierten lejos LA MAYORÍA de los osos (marrón, negro, etc.), pero él dijo tenga cuidado porque no asustan los osos de Grizzly. Él dijo que se advierte a los turistas que miren la tierra en los rastros y por los ríos, prestando la atención particular a los droppings del oso así que pueden ser alertados a la presencia de los osos de Grizzly. Preguntamos cómo nos supusieron saber cuál eran los droppings de Grizzly y él dijo que usted puede manchar fácilmente un Grizzly que cae porque tiene campanas minúsculas en él. Tomamos el plano siguiente de allí.

Translated

Quién es La Ella Caliente

Scenes we've known

The Flash in the Pan Movie Man


No reviews - Whereabouts unknown -
Terminated

 
Ask the bloomin' Cockney Aussie

Concernin' wiv Blokes needin a wankin commitment afore gittin ready as a drover's dog

Bookwoman's Diary

Who is the Bookwoman?

 

Go to her Diary

Millennial Snippets

* A Great Wind Expected
* Hatches Battened 
* A Cooling Breeze Merely Witnessed, not Felt 
* Hatch Battener Excoriated
* Alas, Now Naught But Stultification 
* Happy the Void With Its Incremental Progress 
* See Them Scurry to Avoid the Entropy 
* The Baptism of the Chaotic
* The Horses Swim Ashore as the Boats Remain Becalmed 
* A Cavalry on Foot 
* No Progress Made 
* Ambushed by Atrophy 
* The Horse Latitudes Explained


Take me in Boys!  I might just be ready for the whole
Manifesto

Future Features

Geraldo finally really pisses somebody off 
PETA unsure what to do after dragon eats their representatives
Idiot goes off to work in distant locale
Family boycotts war coverage by watching Survivor - Amazon
French Open Closed
Posse disbands over penis size
Several people get together
Jacknapes find solace in other hinds
Evidence to the contrary poopooed by pope
Journeyman riles locals

 

Last Update: 09/06/2010
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